July 30 - A Letter to HIM
I’m sitting in my office thinking about you today. If I had a dime for every time I thought about you, we could both retire (unless we’re already retired by the time we meet). As a guy, I’m wondering if you think about me in the same way—staring aimlessly out of the window imagining what your future wife is doing now. Yeah, I know, it’s probably a silly girl thing. But when we finally meet, pretend that you do. It will make me feel better.
I laugh because I know you will be very different than how I’ve imagined you over the years. Heck, you’ve changed quite a bit in the last 20-something years already—in my imagination. Your face always looks different, your size and shape are different, but your soul rarely changes. I think it’s because that soul I imagine is very similar to the soul of the men I admire – men like my dad. I’m sorry you won’t be able to meet my parents. They were pretty cool, laid-back people, who would have loved you simply because you love their daughter.
I do want you to know that I pray for you. Not every day, but often. Mostly I just yell at God for not bringing you to me sooner. I’ve been trying to prepare for you as much as possible, while at the same time trying to live my life to the fullest. It’s not always easy because every trip I take, every exciting event that happens, every moment of sadness, I wish you were here with me.
If by some weird chance you read this letter or even sense the essence of this letter, I do want you to know that once you become my HIM, I’m in 100 percent. You should also know that I can look scary without all the hair and makeup, I’m grumpy when under a lot of pressure, I over-analyze everything, and like men, I go into my cave at times, but will almost always want you to come and get me (although I will eventually come out). I’m also not expecting you to be perfect. I think at this point in my life, I have realistic expectations about love and marriage. But you can never know what it’s like until you experience it.
Well, when we finally meet and have decided that we are the one for each other, let’s toast to this day, a time when the mere thought of you brightened my day. May our future be as bright.