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Neenah Pickett

Does anyone have formula for romantic chemistry?



I had more dates this weekend. There are some really great guys out there. I certainly have met a few this weekend. They're not all the best fit for me, but it's encouraging to know that other single, women will scoop them up one day and be pleased! But even as I write this, I can hear the voice in my head say, well if they were so great, why didn't you scoop them up? (Okay, maybe it's not my voice, but the voices of friends' that I've heard in the past).

It's a good question. If the guy is not a jerk, in fact the opposite, he's kind, decent, and even handsome, why would he not be a good fit for me? Does chemistry play an all TOO important role when establishing relationships? I love chemistry and will confess it has a power over me that I can't explain. It can make the most physically unattractive man seem like a prince. And it can put a George Clooney look-alike, on the scale of a Pee Wee Herman.

Before you send me your emails telling how chemistry doesn't last in marriage, let me tell you that I get it. I know that even if I have the best chemistry with a guy while we date, that chemistry can go right out the window when I'm married, so I have to marry for more than chemistry. Again, I get it. (But, seriously, if we can't have it in the marriage, the very least we should feel a little something-something at the beginning).

So what I don't get is where it comes from? Why do I just "click" with some guys and not others? If a guy is a really great guy is there some magical potion I can mix to make me feel some romantic spark? It really would make this whole dating process a lot easier and faster.

I'm curious to hear from any of you who felt no chemistry with your spouse before you got married. Are you out there? How about those of you who were able to conjure (for lack of a better term) chemistry while you were dating. What did you or your significant other do to make it happen? And for all of you who feel the same about chemistry as I do, how long do you keep on dating a guy, while you wait for it to appear?

What I love about a blog is that I don't have to know the answer. This is a journey and hopefully I'll learn more about myself, grow and evolve over this next year. I'm certainly open to listening more and hearing what you have to offer.

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